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Episode 9: Season Finale – WHAT COMES BEFORE CONSENT
25-Dec-2024
Welcome back to My Mum's a Sex Therapist! It’s our season finale, and we’re diving deep into a topic that lays the groundwork for healthier, more fulfilling relationships: what comes before consent.
This week, we unpack the flaws in the traditional consent model. Does the “yes or no” approach to sex leave room for pleasure, equity, or true connection? Spoiler: it doesn’t. Instead, we explore how this binary mindset can lead to power imbalances, misunderstood boundaries, and even the illusion of consent in relationships. Whether you’re single, coupled up, or a relationship veteran, this episode has something for you.
Jacqueline breaks it down, introducing the two essential steps that must come before consent: self-awareness and communication. Together, we discuss how to develop an embodied sense of self—a kind of internal GPS—that allows you to co-create deeply authentic, pleasurable experiences with your partner. Drawing on scientific research and over a decade of clinical experience, Jacqueline also reveals a surprising truth: most couples don’t even know why they’re having sex. And yes, language plays a HUGE role in libido.
We guide you through the process of cultivating self-awareness, tuning into your desires, and learning to understand your partner’s needs—skills that are game-changing for relationships.
In this episode’s Erotic Moments segment, Jacqueline reflects on her deep affection for Sydney, especially the joy of returning home after travels. Meanwhile, Claude opens up about their hectic lifestyle, sparking a discussion about how many of us have become desensitized to stress—and how that impacts intimacy.
At its core, this episode is about learning how to share yourself in ways that feel safe, authentic, and undeniably pleasurable.
Oh, and don’t miss our answers to your burning listener questions!
- I don’t know how to say no to my partner, how do I stop that?
Practice safe, authentic connection this holiday season—and don’t forget that our 2025 retreats make the ultimate Christmas gift (on sale Boxing Day!).
Tune in, and let’s create a world where connection starts way before consent.
Couple’s Bali Retreat https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/couples-tantra-retreat-bali
2nd-6the June and 1st-5th of December 2025.
Bambu Indah Resort in Bali https://www.bambuindah.com/
Couple’s Blue Mountains Retreat https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/couples-tantra-retreat-blue-mountains
14th-16th February, 20th-22nd June and 17th-19th October 2025.
LoveLife Women’s Retreat https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/lovelife-womens-retreat
14th-16th March, 15th-17th August 2025.
Online Course for Men https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/mens-sexual-mastery-course
Online Course for Women https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/womens-sexual-empowerment-course
Online Course for Couples coming in 2025!
If you want more of Jacqueline and Claude, head over to their instagram page @mymumsasextherapist, @nottclaude and @Jacqueline.hellyer.
Jacqueline’s Website https://www.jacquelinehellyer.com/
Our intro and outro music was created By Paul Searls. You can find more of him at https://thesoftlights.com/
This podcast was edited, produced and co-hosted by Claude. You can find them on instagram @nottclaude
Sex Playlists
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https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3Fg231vRMvvbYzBW3h8kGs?si=KNON9K6bQmCW0KF6f9nAYA
Archive
Episode 8: Lovers - HOW TO CREATE LONG LASTING LOVE
Episode 7: Your relationship is like a tripod - HOW TO BUILD A STRONG, LASTING CONNECTION.
Episode 6: The Truth - MALE BODIES
Episode 5: The Truth – FEMALE BODIES ARE SEXUAL PLEASURE MACHINES
Episode 4: The History of Sex - WHY OUR SOCIETY IS SO SEXUALLY DYSFUNCTIONAL
Episode 3: Non-Linear Lovemaking - SEX IS LIKE A PICNIC
Episode 2: Pleasure and Connection - HOW TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT
Episode 1: Meet Jacqueline and Claude
Episode 8: Lovers - HOW TO CREATE LONG LASTING LOVE
Episode 7: Your relationship is like a tripod - HOW TO BUILD A STRONG, LASTING CONNECTION.
Episode 6: The Truth - MALE BODIES
Episode 5: The Truth – FEMALE BODIES ARE SEXUAL PLEASURE MACHINES
Episode 4: The History of Sex - WHY OUR SOCIETY IS SO SEXUALLY DYSFUNCTIONAL
Episode 3: Non-Linear Lovemaking - SEX IS LIKE A PICNIC
Episode 2: Pleasure and Connection - HOW TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT
Episode 1: Meet Jacqueline and Claude
Episode 8: Lovers - HOW TO CREATE LONG LASTING LOVE
Episode 7: Your relationship is like a tripod - HOW TO BUILD A STRONG, LASTING CONNECTION.
Episode 6: The Truth - MALE BODIES
Episode 5: The Truth – FEMALE BODIES ARE SEXUAL PLEASURE MACHINES
Episode 4: The History of Sex - WHY OUR SOCIETY IS SO SEXUALLY DYSFUNCTIONAL
Episode 3: Non-Linear Lovemaking - SEX IS LIKE A PICNIC
Episode 2: Pleasure and Connection - HOW TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT
Episode 1: Meet Jacqueline and Claude